I can’t sleep. I blame it on Paranormal Activity. Now, I love a good scary movie like the next person, OK, more so than the next person, but this creepy fest took hold of me long after I left the ArcLight. Not cool! But at the same time…that’s what I loved about it!

Unlike the bazillion horror movies Hollywood has been churning out in recent years, you know the ones I’m talking about, those formulaic horror shows with cheap scares and splatter kills that only serve to make you jump out of your seat and hide behind your hair, this low-budget film with no-name actors and little-to-no special effects relies on a slow buildup and only a handful of terrifying key images that end up popping up in your brain even when you’re back safely in your bed about to fall asleep. It’s the ultimate mind fuck.

Fans of instant gratification and gore won’t like this movie. And those who hated The Blair Witch Project, which is similar in that it seems to be filmed by the actors and there is no visible antagonist, will definitely not like Paranormal Activity.

But for those who relish real fear — the kind that gives you goosebumps, makes the hair at the back of your neck stand up and scares you into the fetal position — well, you’ll love love love this movie!

Owen Gleiberman of Entertainment Weekly:

With its this-is-really-happening vibe, Paranormal Activity scrapes away 30 years of encrusted nightmare clichés. The fear is real, all right, because the fear is really in you.

Paranormal Activity appears to be a basic haunted house movie but unlike those the characters can’t escape their tormentor simply by leaving the house. We’re talking personal demons here, leaving them with nowhere to run to. Eeeek!

The young couple in the film just moved into a house somewhere in San Diego. Katie (Katie Featherston) is a student into knitting and beadwork and her boyfriend Micah (Micah Sloat) is…well, I’m not sure what he does, just that he loves the new camera that he bought. He had initially bought it to capture the strange goings-on they’d been experiencing in the house, but in the end that need to capture those strange goings-on is what ultimately gets them in trouble.

You see, this thing in their home is a demon, not a ghost, and it feeds off negativity. It’s best to not try to antagonize it or communicate with it. At least that’s what the psychic who they hired tells them. Micah naturally takes that as a challenge, and his pride and his curiosity…well, cause him to do dumb things.

I love the reality-based nature of this movie, from its first-person camerawork to the actors using their real names to the fast-forward through footage. It makes what we witness here plausible.

It’s only at the very end where the movie unfortunately diverges from that path, leaving me, my bf and family (fans of this movie and horror films) to try and dream up alternate endings that would be more fitting with the rest of the movie.

Apparently there were two alternate endings filmed for this movie, but from the sounds of it, although they were a little more in keeping with the movie, they just weren’t as conventionally satisfying, I guess.

Regardless, I still loved Paranormal Activity and would see it again. Maybe on Halloween! It’s definitely fun seeing it in a theater with an audience. This is one of the few movies where I actually don’t mind people talking during the screening. “Micah sure is dumb,” “Maaan! Don’t open the door!” “Duuude, that is creepy.”

And when the epilogue flashed on the screen after that last scene, the folks sitting behind me asked no one in particular, “That’s it?” Little did they know that wasn’t the last of it. I’m sure they slept with all the lights on that night. I did.

Showtimes for Paranormal Activity.

I don’t know why I still resist watching animated movies. I LOVED so many of them after I got over the initial “toons are for kids” hangup. WALL-E, Finding Nemo, Monsters, Inc. — all good stuff! But even with Pixar’s newest animated film, Up, I struggled a bit. I think it was because of Carl Fredrickson, the dour-looking senior citizen and main character of the story, whose frowny face populates the movie posters. Why would I want to spend an hour and a half watching a cartoon about a grumpy old man?

Thank gawd I saw that Rottentomatoes.com gave it an uber fresh 98%. Because here you have a road trip movie, a buddy flick and a love story (my eyes are watering up just thinking about it) all in one. Up is hilarious and yet has depth that adults will appreciate — from the unspoken need of a boy for his father’s approval to an old man’s desire to fulfill his wife’s lifelong wish.

From the Minneapolis Star Tribune:

From the title onward, Up is a stratospheric success. It’s guaranteed to lift your spirits, and not with a pushy DreamWorks-style gag reel of celebrity voices and committee-processed one-liners.

There were many moments when I was laughing so hard that tears were rolling down my cheeks — the scary-looking villain with the unexpected chipmunk voice HI-larious! — and then there were moments when I was silently bawling and struggling to hide this fact from my bf; “Why are my contacts so dry?”

But not to fret, there were also colorful creatures and cute talking animals — I love Dug “SQUIRREL!” the tracker dog — as well as a mysterious world with crazy landscapes. And who can forget that fantastic mode of transportation that rivals James’ Giant Peach: the house held aloft by a bajillion happy-hued balloons.

In the end Carl endeared himself to me. I ended up loving his frowny face, his walker with tennis balls for feet and his even his grumpiness, appropriately voiced by Ed Asner. And even the 8-year-old Wilderness Explorer, Russell, voiced by non-child actor (he’s a child who’s not an actor, that is) Jordan Nagai, wasn’t annoying but pretty cute in that awkward and sweet way.

But, for me the talking dogs stole the show. If you’ve ever had a dog as a pet, you’d understand, recognizing and appreciating the dog culture, from the “Cone of shame” to the irresistibility of tennis balls and hatred of squirrels.

I’d totally go see this movie again and even own it when it comes out on DVD. It’s screening in 3D but I saw it in the regular way and it was still mighty enjoyable. Although, this 9-year-old I know excitedly told me that I just HAD to see it in 3D. With the colors, the flying scenes and even the action sequences, I may just have ta. BTW, if you’re not crazy about kids, see it at night when it’s past their bedtime.

Gypsy woman (Lorna Raver) hexes poor Christine Brown (Alison Lohman) in Drag Me to Hell

The creepiness of Spider-Man director Sam Raimi’s new movie, Drag Me to Hell, slowly works its way on you much like a gypsy curse. In the initial viewing of it, you might squeal a bit and laugh a lot but never really squirm from actual fear. It’s not til much later, when, say you have to walk to your car in an empty garage or when you have to turn on the light on the far end of a dark room that the creepiness sets in. Eeeee! Lamia!

I think it’s because I underestimated its scariness. Because, Drag Me to Hell is really more a slapstick comedy in the guise of a horror film than something instantly chilling like The Ring. And that’s classic Raimi. His Evil Dead movies from the ’80s (my fave is Evil Dead II) may have dealt with the walking and twitchy undead, possessed and murderous hands, and blood gushing out of walls but they were also pretty hilarious. I half-expected Bruce “Gimme Some Sugar, Baby” Campbell (Ash from the Evil Dead movies) to have a cameo.

DMTH’s storyline is a good enough scary story with the hapless Everygirl Christine Brown, played by the doe-eyed Alison Lohman, who is tormented by a Lamia via a gypsy curse and tries desperately to undo the hex. What sucks, like any tragedy, is that this didn’t have to happen. See, she’s a loan officer at this bank and she could have extended the creepy gypsy woman’s home loan (I would have!), but because she so badly wanted to impress her boss enough to get the vacant assistant manager position, she doesn’t. And that’s when things go very badly for our young heroine. Ay yi yi.

And yes, there were many times when I hid behind my hair but that was only to avoid gross-out moments. Of which there were many, like the oozing green goo from embalmed bodies and flying eyeballs that kept my bf and the rest of the theater shrieking with laughter.

While I kept my eyes averted from the screen, I couldn’t help but wonder, why has this movie been lauded by film critics, earning a 94% on RottenTomatoes.com? It’s not scary, and one too many times it resorts to that cheap scare tactic used in modern horror movies — chilling music buildup, momentary silence with sigh of relief and then LOUD surprise. Bah! Oh, is this when I should get in the fetal position? After the 10th time, I didn’t even flinch, except to roll my eyes.

From A.V. Club:

[Sam Raimi] wants viewers to jump out of their chairs, to laugh and scream and cheer, and to nudge each other over the transcendent ridiculousness of what they’re witnessing. This is junk filmmaking at its finest.

And I don’t know if it was just the mall movie theater I was in — AMC Loews Broadway 4 on Santa Monica’s Third Street Promenade — but the volume felt like it was turned to 11. The tweeners in the audience, of course, loved it, but OW my old ears!

But I didn’t hate the movie. It was good fun, the characters were likable (except that overly creepy gypsy woman), and it wasn’t too formulaic. In fact, I liked how they didn’t go for the easy save. Tragedies had to happen here and often did. Awesome.

I think DMTH is the perfect flick to watch on a weekend night before that barhop. If you’ve already watched Star Trek, that is. Drag Me to Hell is such a refreshing scary movie in this era of torture porn and remakes. And I naturally welcome Raimi’s return to horror and can’t even wait to see if there really is going to be an Evil Dead IV in 2011.

BTW, I highly recommend that you see this movie at the ArcLight or any movie theater that’s not in a mall. Since it’s PG-13, it seems that it’s the perfect opportunity for teenagers to socialize.

During our Friday night screening, gaggles of teens populated the theater screaming at the screen, text messaging with their bright phones and conversing during the movie’s critical moments. One group even got kicked out. HA ha!

OK, I LOVED the book. I admit it. When I was single, He’s Just Not That Into You was a much needed wake-up call. OF COURSE! Why do I always make excuses for these guys who basically treat me like shit? Why do I do all the work to make things happen? Why the stress of deciphering every little email, phone call, date?

And then by just reading the title of the book, I had my answer. Of course, you really don’t need to read the 165 pages to figure out that if it’s too much work then you and him ain’t happening. But you read it anyway because it’s easily digestible fun and, like most romantic comedies, that’s why you’d go and see the movie version.

HJNTIY is definitely a guilty pleasure and obviously a chick flick. Although when I saw it last night there were at least 20 guys there and most didn’t come with dates. But I loved watching it with a bunch of women anyway. We reacted to the same things like when Scarlett Johansson’s character described Bradley Cooper’s ass as one she’d like to dry hump, we all found ourselves checking it out when they showed him walking away. “He does have a nice ass!” said the lady sitting behind me. Then I laughed because I had just been thinking the same thing.

We awww‘d and cooed when Ben Affleck’s character did something unbelievably sweet for his live-in girlfriend, played by Jennifer Aniston. And we hid behind our hair when Ginnifer Goodwin left really awkward voicemail messages for the guys she was stalking, I mean courting.

The only thing that kinda bugged me is that the original message of the book wasn’t carried through to the end of the film. The book, and the movie early on, basically tells you to ignore the exceptions and that you are the rule.

So don’t listen to your friends who tell you that the friend of a friend went through the exact same thing you’re going through where she hadn’t heard from the guy in a year and then he finally called, they got together and now are ecstatically married. Real life doesn’t happen like that and as women we often grasp onto those exceptions like a beacon of hope when really we should just get over it and move on.

From Newsweek:

The real question is, why didn’t they re-title the movie He’s Just Not That Into You … Until He Is?

But as this is a romantic comedy, you know there’s a happy ending. There’s gotta be. And that’s when you realize, hmm, guess there is a problem with turning a non-fiction book into a rom-com and that you’ve just been supplied with a fresh batch of happily-ever-afters to cling to. D’oh!

But it’s fun! And it’s not like it’s pretending to be anything else. Sure, it has a bunch of A-listers in it but don’t let that confuse you. Go see it with your best girlfriends. It’s the perfect movie to watch on V-Day. For single ladies, not couples, mind you. I wouldn’t do that to my bf. Althoughhh, Scarlett Jo’s bodacious boobs often showcased in tight shirts here might provide ample entertainment for most dudes.

Suffice it to say, critics seem to hate this movie. It got 40% on RottenTomatoes.com, putting it up there with Beverly Hills Chihuahua. But if you loved Sex and the City, you’ll love this movie, Roger Ebert be damned.

OMG I actually liked a Ben Stiller movie. I haven’t liked anything he’s been in since There’s Something About Mary. I hated Zoolander, Meet the Fockers, Dodgeball…if he was in it, I hated it. But after I found myself giggling at the trailers and Rottentomatoes.com gave Tropic Thunder a healthy 84% I decided to give ol’ Ben a chance.

And surprisingly, the people I thought would fer sure be annoying in this movie, i.e. Ben, Tom Cruise and Matthew McConaughey weren’t that bad. In fact everyone toed that line of being funny without going over the top to astronomically annoying. Even Jack Black. To paraphrase a controversial line in the movie, no one went full imbecile. It was amazing. I actually liked everyone in this cast.

Of course there were a few moments when you hoped they wouldn’t “go there” and of course they did. Ben Stiller did write and direct the movie, after all. I just hid behind my hair during those gross-out scenes. At least there were instances in the story when that wasn’t the case; where you thought you could predict the next line or reaction and they’d go a completely other way.

As for the controversial use of the word “retard” and the depiction of a mentally disabled person, in the context of the movie, it didn’t seem like a big deal to me. When I first heard of the protesters, I felt for them. The R-word is a hateful word and we’ve come so far from those days when that word was considered funny. But this movie was about stoopid people making a stoopid blockbuster movie and the way they spoke, lived their misguided lives, took on situations, etc. weren’t things to be admired.

And for me, the humor wasn’t in the use of the word but rather in the conversation between the characters where Robert Downey Jr.’s “five-time Oscar-winning” Kirk Lazarus is giving Stiller’s Tugg Speedman acting advice. Taken out of context, not funny at all. In the movie? HI-larious. Anyway, the best line in the movie wasn’t that one, but rather “I’m a lead farmer, muthafucka!” You’ll find yourself saying that line over and over again after watching the movie.

Also there was some controversy with Robert Downey Jr.’s character’s portrayal of a black man. But with “another” black actor in the movie constantly keeping RDJ’s Lazarus in check and berating him for his stereotypical depiction, well he said everything you’d want to say to Lazarus, too.

And frankly, Robert Downey Jr. stole this movie, playing a confused but talented Australian actor (a la Russell Crowe) committing to his role as a black Vietnam sergeant named Osiris. He was so committed, in fact, that when he was disguised as a Chinese farmer and spoke Mandarin, he still did so as Osiris — a black man speaking Mandarin, not as the Chinese farmer he was pretending to be.

Tom Cruise was pretty close to stealing the show, too, as the maniacal studio head but instead he just came away with one of the best cameos in a movie ever. I even almost liked him. Good career move on his part. Just when you thought he went on the deep end of crazy, he took a risk and played this part to the hilt, almost redeeming himself.

So, yeah, I really loved this movie. It was nonstop funny. I thought for sure I’d reach that point that I usually reach in over-the-top comedies, when I stop laughing and start rolling my eyes. But that wasn’t the case here. The storyline was solid and so were the characters. Not only is this a film I wouldn’t mind seeing again in a theater, but I’d like to own it when it hits DVD.

I’m a lead farmer, muthafucka!