Dear Caroline on Crack: Downtown Hotel Bar That Screams Sex?

Photo from Figueroa Hotel’s site.

Hey, fruitcake.

T-Dawg, here. Long time no see. Hope you’re well.

Two things (three things, actually):

1. You’re awesome.

2. I’m surprised that Del’s Saloon in Santa Monica isn’t mentioned on your site (or perhaps I missed it). Real Cadillac margaritas (super strong, with Cointreau and Grand Marnier) for $7. After drinking two — in rocks glasses, mind you — my friend stumbled to my car, puked on the seat, and passed out in it. I think we can both appreciate that kind of endorsement.

3. Can you recommend a good downtown hotel bar? Something that screams “sex” would be ideal.

Thanks,

T-Dawg

Hey there, T-Dawg, long time no see indeed!

I used to want to go to Del’s but none of my friends want the adventure. Plus I heard it’s a dive and not in a good way. But maybe I’ll give it a look-see.

As for a hotel bar that screams sex, um, it depends on what kind of sex you’re looking for. Raunchy? Classy rendezvous? Impress-her-for-a-night? For the latter, I’d say the Standard’s Roof Top bar. They even have beds up there with gorgeous views of the city. Their drinks are a pretty penny but that’ll work in your favor if you’re trying to impress the girl. Just remember that martini glasses aren’t a good idea in bed.

For classy rendezvous there’s the Gallery Bar and Cognac Room at the historical Biltmore, which will make your date feel so elegant with its high ceilings and Art Deco decor. They even have a special Manhattan menu with six versions of the drink! But maybe seduce her with a French Kiss or their signature Black Dahlia cocktail, a girly drink concoction of Kahlua and Chambord.

But I personally like the Figueroa Hotel‘s Veranda Bar overlooking the pool. It’s Moroccan theme so very sensual and low-lit. Although truth be told, I’m not crazy about the drinks there. Stick to simple mixed drinks and either lounge in the bed or find a cozy dark corner by the pool on the patio area appropriately called Rick’s Place. BTW, no skinny dipping in their pool. Apparently they don’t like that.

Uh, hope that hel…. I mean, don’t forget to use a condom.

Caroline